Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
