I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
it hurts more in the daytime
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
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