NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize