I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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