I puked a lego.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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