I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize