how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize