the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have surprise drugs for everyone
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize