so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
