You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
