I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Liz is crying about burritos again.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
