i used baking grease as lip gloss
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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