covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
