There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
