we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Pants are for mortals
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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