Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Randomize
