When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
