this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Semen is not good for contacts.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Randomize
