Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I'm at about main and main street
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
