READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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