why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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