It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
