dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
