I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
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You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
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