i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
