Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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