we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
