Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
