brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Green mimosas i think yes
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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