"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
is that a dick in a sweater?
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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