It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
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