You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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