Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
