Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Randomize
