You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize