wat bout pragnant strippers??
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
