Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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