btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
