I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
