Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
