what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
