This is not my ceiling
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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