did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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