she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.