I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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