so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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