escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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