Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Enjoy the penises
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
