the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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