only you would photoshop your dick
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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